Anticipation

Anticipation... As we near the end of my pregnancy I find myself anxious, scared, excited, nervous, ecstatic, overwhelmed and so so so many other emotions I'm not sure I could put it all into words. I have heard a million people say that when they were pregnant with their second child they weren't sure they could love the second baby as much as the first, because the love for a child is so strong. I know that loving this child will not be an issue for me as I already love him to the ends of this universe. I think I am nervous to be a mother of TWO I will have charge over two of Heavenly Father's sweet spirits, for this I feel so incredibly blessed, beyond anything I could comprehend. I also feel very overwhelmed at the thought that these two lives are in my hands for my caring and I will be held responsible for the things that they get out of this world until they are old enough to make the decisions themselves and be accountable and even then I will be here to give them the guidance they need to make the right choices (I just hope I can raise them to know that they can come to me) Wow! Motherhood is an AWESOME calling in every respect of the word. I am anxious for Jason and how he will feel when the new little one arrives, I can not bare to think that he may feel replaced or pushed aside and I don't know how I will be able to balance a newborn and a toddler and be able to give them both my whole self ( is this something that just comes with having or two?) to be the best possible mommy I can be. I am excited to see these two boys grow close together as they get older and become best buds that have each others backs. I can't wait to meet this new little one and hug and kiss him and let him know how very loved he really is. Now if I can just get my house in order to fit him somewhere...