What I Would Do

I just have had something on my mind ...so what the heck, my blog stalker needs something to read...love you ash!      So i'll spill my thoughts they may not be pretty or organized.  So as most of us know Angel...I am one of  the 3 in the statistic of women that have fertility issues, lucky me.  My heart aches for those of us that fall into that category. I was recently speaking with my sister about how sick she gets when she is pregnant and she told me of a story when another woman was complaining about how much trouble she was having (speaking of my sister) and another woman came up to my sister's friend and told her " you know I would endure that one million times to have my own child" my sister told me that she was so glad that she had not been the one complaining (if I were in her position on bed rest from pretty much day one and fearing for her child's health, because she can keep anything in her stomach I would). I was so proud of that lady  for not getting angry, but maybe opening the eyes of those who can conceive a child of their own. I'm not so sure I could control my resentment (for lack of a better word). Now don't get me wrong... I am so happy for,  if not one of the happiest when I hear of a loved one's blessing of a child, because I know how great the desire can be and I can only in a small way start to allow myself to feel what it would feel like to know that I could be expecting...only after so many failed attempts. I know that our Father in Heaven has a plan for me and bry and our children and I have great faith that my desires will be given...the when is the part that always gets me. I was also so  proud of that lady, because she knew what she would be willing to endure to have a child....I've seen so many around me with their own bumps in the road concerning a child...Would I be willing to go through what these people have and are going through to have a child, is that selfish, is it worth it? I believe so, for me at least in all respects.